Monday, September 23, 2013

Off Again

I was seeing a guy for a while and it ended recently - about three weeks ago. I've been surprised at how this particular ending has lingered . . . I don't feel upset very often, and I'm not crying into my Ben & Jerry's. It's not like that. I just think about him, think about conversations we had and time we spent together. It's not even all the time, but he comes to mind regularly. I thought I might run into him today at Rose City Comic Con, so I was mildly bracing for that. And then I went to an India.Arie show tonight (WOW - really. Really, really wow.) and I had wanted to take him, so I couldn't help but think of him during that. There are a couple more things coming up, like the Blazers/Cleveland game, that I thought we'd be going to together. I guess that will be a little bittersweet, but maybe after those events pass I'll think of him less.

I liked him a lot. He seemed different, was different, than a lot of people I meet and guys I've dated. In the end, it wasn't a terribly mature situation - we did a little on/off, which I don't think I've ever done before. I mean, once it's off - there's no real reason to think it's going to work. At least, under normal circumstances. And when we parted ways, he kind of did me wrong. I mean, he definitely did. But again, the whole thing wasn't ideal for either of us. I wasn't at my best either.

I talked about him here before - in April. I was all excitement, and then disappointment. When it was time to get excited again, I didn't blog about him. I think I was too busy being excited that he was back. But I'm surprised at how much this one is staying with me, so I wanted to put it on paper. I had a huge amount of fun with him. And I thought we had something kind of unique. I think more than upset, I'm just surprised that it didn't work - really surprised. It still seems like it should have, even with kind of a crash and burn at the end. So back to disappointment. One last time, at least with this guy.



  1. eesh… I'm sorry you've had another near-miss. I know the feeling. I'm currently reeling from something that has ended that was never very promising, but he still got under my skin. I know what you mean about events coming up that you really wanted to share with that person, that will carry the association even though they're not with you, that will not be the same without them.

    People can be really surprising.

    And by "surprising" I mean "idiots".

  2. I'm sorry, Kimberly. That "unknown" part always makes it linger. Apparently, the universe knew that you are worth more.